The Cristal Baller: Kentucky

Welcome to the Cristal Baller, where we make wholly unsubstantiated predictions on how all of the SEC teams will be performing in the 2009 season. Just like in Hollywood casting, couch time is rewarded with preferential treatment.

Kentucky has the hottest coach on the market and pulled maybe the best recruiting class of all time . . . in basketball. With Calipari probably bringing Kentucky B-ball back to the forefront it will be up to Rich Brooks to keep some spotlight on a very decent Kentucky football team. Brooks has built up Kentucky football into a respectable program and shouldn’t surrender all the limelight.

Kentucky had a decent year last year that ended in a Liberty Bowl victory, but they will be hard pressed to keep that up this year. In their first six games Kentucky has a chance to go 1-5 and a slim chance to go 0-6. This schedule gets moderately better in the second half of the year. But I wouldn’t count on a bowl this year unless returning QB Mike Hartline can really move the offense.

Season Predictions: 4-8

Kentucky 28 Miami (OH) 17
This is an away game for the Wildcats and the Redhawks might not be terrible but I don’t see Rich Brooks having too much trouble with this sub-par MAC team.

Kentucky 31 Louisville 24
While most rivalry games are at the end of year this heated one is right at the beginning. Louisville coach Steve Kragthorpe is literally hanging by a thread at Louisville, and beating their rival would help his cause. It won’t happen as Kentucky outscores Louisville and plays better D.

Florida 41 Kentucky 17
Unless Tebow, Spikes, and the rest of the Gators gets struck by lightning look for this to be a blowout of epic proportion, as Kentucky does not match up in any way to the mighty Gators.

Alabama 21 Kentucky 10
I don’t foresee Kentucky keeping it close last year. Bama should effectively stop the big blue offense and score a few points of their own.

South Carolina 17 Kentucky 3
This game has the feel of an almost shutout game. Maybe Kentucky squeaks a field goal by a very good South Carolina defense, but don’t bet on it.

Auburn 28 Kentucky 9
You’ll have to see my Auburn review for this to make sense, but Auburn will be reeling after two losses and will take out their aggression on a worn out Kentucky offense. Tough three weeks playing Alabama, Auburn, and South Carolina’s D. I feel bad for Hartline.

Kentucky 27 La-Monroe 7
After the Alabama fiasco, don’t expect La-Monroe to be beating anymore SEC teams in the near future. Kentucky should have no problem running all over the Warhawks.

Mississippi State 14 Kentucky 10
I’m sorry Kentucky fans but I foresee the worst. You will be beaten by Mississippi State. I think by now new coach Dan Mullen will have Mississippi State’s offense working and the D should have no trouble with Kentucky’s offense.

Kentucky 34 Eastern Kentucky 13
The odds on Eastern Kentucky winning are 300 to 0 meaning a bet of $0 pays $300. Still there are very few takers.

Vanderbilt 21 Kentucky 17
This game might very well decide who wins the SEC East, if Georgia, Florida, Tennessee, and South Carolina all contract leprosy. I like Vandy’s D over Kentucky’s offense.

Georgia 34 Kentucky 20
In keeping with Kentucky’s punching bag status, Georgia fresh of their loss to Florida, gets revenge the only way they know how. Beat up a very average Kentucky team at Sanford stadium. Beware the black-out Wildcat fans.

Tennessee 20 Kentucky 13
Nothing would make me happier than seeing Tennessee and Lane Kiffin humiliated by the Wildcats. Sadly for Kentucky fans what I want usually doesn’t happen at the end of the season.